Thursday, August 5

Okay. Now it's too fast.


I really wanted to be done being pregnant. Now I'm not sure I can handle what comes after... or what I have to do as it gets close.

Don't get me wrong. I am absolutely miserable. It's 105 outside (at 9 am) and I cannot do more than one errand before being so pooped that we HAVE to head home. Sad thing is that I still have errands to run. I don't know how I'm going to do it.

I feel like I've been hit in the crotch with a baseball bat and someone is constantly playing the "I'm not touching you" game with their knees in my stomach.

Poor Eliot has had to watch TV for entertainment. She has now seen EVERY episode of Dora, Wonder Pets, and an occasional Olivia or Blue's Clues. I'm sure she's in heaven. I don't even care about being a good mom at this point.

I've lost my appetite. I still feel the need to make dinner but I don't eat it.

I'm feeling extremely anxious about how I'm going to schedule having cutely painted toes for my delivery. I know this is dumb, but how do you get a pedicure early enough but then have it last so it still looks cute when you have the baby?

I have the same issue with book reading. If I put a book on hold at the library, I can only have it for three weeks. How do I schedule those three weeks so they fall during my time while I'm in the recovery room at the hospital?

On a side note, we bought Eliot's big-girl bunk bed and put it together last weekend. I wasn't planning on having her sleep in it until well after the baby was born but she's had different plans. Since it's been assembled, she's slept in it every night. She starts out in it and then wants to get in her crib, but eventually ends up in the bed. My baby isn't in her crib anymore. She's getting so big. It makes me sad.

What if I don't love the new baby like I love Eliot? What if I love the new baby more?

3 comments:

Laura Hall said...

How very intersting you said that. I wonder every day how it is possible to love another baby like I do my Olive. I guess it just happens, and you just do- or else people wouldnt keep doing it I guess. Hope you are doing well. Love and miss you!

Audrey said...

I remember wondering how I could possibly love another child as much as I loved my first. You can do it. Then, you'll look back and laugh that you worried.
I definitely relate to the dilema of being pregnant vs. wanting to not be pregnant. It's a tough decision. Those first few nights, every time the baby cried I would wake up and think, "What in the world is that noise?"

Jack and Annie said...

I'll come over and paint your toes..it won't be professional but at least they will be painted! LOL

I am still getting used to having another little one in the house but loving all of it!